The Right to Marry and Childrearing
By Leneé Cobb
This article was prompted after reading Ivaberanek’s very thoughtful article titled Whatever you say, say nothing. I began to write my feelings into her comment section and it didn’t take me long to conclude I had more to say than would be feasible to merely comment about. I’ve also read this subject covered by a couple other bloggers here on WordPress. It is a divisive subject, a private and yet public and political subject. Nevertheless, for those willing and brave enough to tread deep waters, here’s my take.
First, though, know this: I’ve never written an opinion piece, ever. This is new and scary ground for me. My hope is this will instigate more individuals, regardless of who they are or what they believe, to more good works, plain and simple.
Same sex marriage
Protection by the state is a key issue. To me, the word “marriage” is sort of a “state” word. As such, I think there is too much ado about defining that word. Marriages must be licensed, etc., to be legit, according to . . . the state, or government entity, anyway.
The only way in many areas for couples to receive survivor benefits and stuff like that, even divorce settlements, are if they were in a “legitimate marriage.” This was blatantly unfair to a lot of people, whether or not we happened to agree with their chosen lifestyle.
We who believe in free will, should we not honor the will of others, especially in matters of what they’d wish for their loved ones? For someone to lose a life partner only to be left with nothing due to some stinking marriage law is unfathomable to me, regardless of my faith.
Marriage, besides being afforded to those whom the state decides to oblige, is also a cultural thing and its definitions vary accordingly.
Therefore, therefore . . . heavy sigh.
Childrearing and even abortion
Also, there are not enough men and women married couples willing to adopt or provide foster care to the myriad amount of children that need it. I know this. I’ve a right to say it. Unless more (kagilleons more) Christians open up their hearts and homes to these kids they should . . .
I am a Christian, what I call a “basic” Christian. Just like when we, as writers, do well to use well-chosen verbs, we’d do well, as human beings by activating ourselves to fulfill the voids in people’s lives. (Did I say that right? That sentence may be subject to revision later.)
I have been a foster parent and an adoptive parent, and a biological parent. I’ve witnessed the protestors in front of the abortion clinics and sometimes have gone up to ask them just how many of them have opened up their homes, pocketbooks, and hearts to the women heading into the clinics? How many of them are or have been foster parents? Adoptive parents? So far, I’ve found no protestor that tells me they have. What is that?
Action with understanding matters. For those of you with kaboodles of money who’d rather just write a check, the harvest is there. The laborers are few. More laborers are needed! What’s needed more than money are your hands, your home, your heart.
Faith without action (works) is dead. This is no new statement. (James chapter 2.) To protest without ever opening your home and heart . . . actually get your hands dirty in the real lives of individuals . . . taking risks . . .
Spend a couple hours a week holding a protest sign attempting to make people who conclude, for whatever reasons, that they have no options feel guilty; or become licensed to provide foster care or an adoptive parent and deal with all the baggage that comes with that responsibility . . .
Which is of those is work, really?
Being an adoptive parent or a foster parent is work that’s guaranteed to break hearts because there’s no avoiding broken hearts when you invest yourself into someone’s life. It doesn’t matter who it is. Life can really suck at times. However, risking your heart to care for someone else has rich rewards. You know that. Do it anyway.
If someone else is fulfilling a need that others refuse to, and those who refusing the work have the audacity to bitch at those actually doing it . . .
Therefore, therefore . . . heavy sigh.
I appreciate the good works of others. I really do. I don’t care who you are. You, action taker, are needed.
There was a man who inspired me, a particular pastor of rare insight. He and his wife not only raised numerous children of their own, they opened up their hearts and home to over 50 foster children. Now there was a man who practiced what he preached, a man I could learn from, a man I respected as a human being, a rarity among – – should I go ahead and say it? – – Christians.
Final thoughts: 1Corinthians 13 verse 1, and Matthew chapter 25. Those interested will recognize what I’m referring to when they read it.
Therefore, therefore . . .
Whenever the opportunity arises, chose action with understanding.